Friday, June 26, 2015

Current works in progress

i’ve had a few good days this week that i’ve been able to get creative with.  it’s been great!  and not only creating, but i’ve also done housework (gasp!).

this first canvas was already painted on, someone else’s work that i gessoed over in a sloppy, painterly way to create big brush strokes.  i love that look and will be doing it again.  the textures are great, and the colors that come from staying in the textures are so yummy!

i sprayed india ink and covered it with acrylics and more spray until I was happy





here is some texture love;



look how the colors stayed in the grooves!


heaven!




the second project came to me as i was cleaning out the bird cage with a toothbrush.  i must have been in a zone because i was thinking of chakras and lotus flowers.  one canvas for each chakra with its color and symbol and a lotus flower to create a connectedness.  i had no clue that each chakra had two symbols, one is a lotus flower with a certain number of petals.  i have no knowledge about chakras, except they are energy in the body, each in a certain area of the body, and if they are blocked you have problems.  and that they each have a color connected to them.  that’s the limit to my knowledge on the subject.  so, upon researching them and hearing that one of the symbols is actually a lotus i was thrilled that my vision was a good one.  if i had thought of sunflowers and chakras it wouldnt have gone together as nicely.

yesterday i spent most of the day researching, sketching , and painting these canvasses.  they are small 8”x10” paintings so as to not take up a whole room with them!  they are not complete at all, and the throat chakra (blue) has yet to be started.

here are the 7 canvasses together; 
my 14 year old pup, pita, is apparently being the size reference.  isn't that nice of him?



base chakra

sacral chakra

solar plexus chakra

heart chakra

third eye chakra

and a sideways crown chakra that has two more rows of petals left to do



i'm not feeling as good today, so will not attempt working on such detailed work.  i will possibly go fling paint on another canvas, but we shall see.  yesterday was a huge art day, so i won't feel so bad if i take today off.

until later,
jenny


Friday, June 19, 2015

my newest creation(s)

i've been tweaking my portrait the last few days, and am pretty happy with her.  i think she may actually be close to done!


she really makes my heart sing when i stand next to her!  the layers are amazing.  i fixed her shoulders so they are less football player, made her neck thinner as well, and did several attempts at her eyebrows before getting to this point.

her hair is now a beautiful shade of teal which was a fantabulous accident that i squealed about when i saw how wonderful it was;

SWOON!

she will be called 'listen to spirit'.



and i played with an owl this morning.  i've been wanting to paint an owl, and today got another nudge by an artist i admire who did a mixed media owl with papers and paint.  

i knew today was the day for owl when i read her post explaining some of the symbology of the critter.  they hold transition, wisdom and intuition with them and these are important symbols for me to attach myself to right now, as i go thru my own change and wish to be more intuitive with my art.

i had the perfect background of india inks i had saved from using stencils on another canvas.  i had just smeared the inks and let them dry and then added other colors in acrylics and sprayed more inks over it all until i was happy.



then i sketched my owl with charcoal and oil pastels.  i knew the turquoise by the bottom would be perfect for a branch;



i sprayed some orange around the owl, and didn't like how it sprayed.  i think the sprayer may be gummed up.  so i used a paper towel to get the ink all over the background around the owl, trying to keep the owl more blue and yellow;



i really liked the contrast here, and wanted to create more, so i used a white wash of white acrylic with water and washed the owl to make the body more soft of a color overall.  i used the same whitewash with his legs and feet, and went around them with a brown to give them some shadowing. i used oil pastel for his owlie hood by his eyes, and painted in his eyes with yellow and blue, and a brown for his beak.  i also added another layer of turquoise for the branch and added brown around it for shadow;




after waiting a bit i went back to work on him.  i added highlights to his eyes with white, and outlined them in brown.  i added more white wash to his body and outlined areas like wing and belly with a brown to highlight.  i shaded his whole body as well, outlining with the brown color.  i added some leaves and highlighted with a lighter green, and then sprayed the background with a burgundy india ink, trying to stay away from mr. owlie.


he may be done!

until later,
jenny

Wednesday, June 17, 2015

birthing is difficult

i have so many ideas for the future of my life and art and am feeling overwhelmed by the hugeness of it all.  here is what is on my mind;

* i have about 5 works in progress at the moment, and ideas for more in my head.  i want to just get them all out, to work on them, be done, and go onto the next big project, getting my works done *in order* and have them in my handy-dandy database of completed art.

* i really would like to start a mixed media journal, even though i balk at them because paint=money

* i found this online course i would love to do, and spoke to mark about it with guilt in my heart because its a lot of money for us right now.  he agreed to spend the money on me, because it would make me happy and things are ok for us.  he is always the supportive hubby!

* i need to practice sketching in my sketch book, not canvas, not painted in a journal, but pencil drawings.


and what i keep going back to is... i must wait until my art studio is done for me to be my most creative self.  what i had been doing was thinking of the studio completion as the beginning of my art business; the selling of it.   i should be thinking of it as the beginning of my art busy-ness, the letting go and playing with color, texture and materials.



the works in progress will be finished when they call to me.  that creative spark can not be forced.  if i have other ideas that want to come i should work with them, at least in my sketch book.  if i can only put a highlight on a certain canvas one day before going to another, thats ok.

i have no space currently to really play in a mixed media journal.  i need the studio desk and all my supplies handy, as well as an easily cleanable space in order to really do this well.  i just don't feel comfortable working on my old dining room table any more.

the online course will be a great resource for me to get to know media better and to find my own voice.  it's a year long, start whenever you wish, go as slowly as you need course with lots of videos and skills to learn from, from an artist who's style i enjoy.  BUT, right now i want to spend that money on finishing my studio so i can better do the course.  the course will wait until it's a better time for me.

i figure the sketch book practice is the one thing that i can work on regularly right now, when energy and pain levels cooperate.  i can sketch on the couch with a mirror doing five minutes at a time so it doesn't have to become tiresome.  it should become a more faithful routine for me, something i should schedule time for until it gets to be something i do each day to feel complete.



i have so many ideas for the future of my life and art and am feeling overwhelmed by the hugeness of it all... and i don't need to be!  all i need to do is get thru this particular moment in time.  what needs my immediate attention *right now*?  thats what i need to focus on, and let the other ideas flow as they will, write or sketch them down and then go on to the next moment.  it's not a do-this-or-die situation here, jenny!

what i need to do is treat this time as a pregnancy.  yes, i'm excited and nervous about the impending birth of my (whatever it will be), but right now i'm nurturing it by doing these deep breathing exercises, by finding my way through a more natural flow of creativity, not forcing things right now. by waiting.  i can make plans on paper when ideas strike and create a routine that will further my success when my studio is open for daily use.  but stress is never good for any pregnancy, even a creative one.

until later,
jenny

Monday, June 15, 2015

putting off decisions

i started HeavenSpirit Creations while making spirit dolls about ten years ago.  the poseable dolls were a creative outlet while my grandmother was transitioning to the other side after a stroke, and they were a way for me to meditate and listen to spirit.



these dolls took a toll on my body and i tried to develop other ways to make them that would be more gentle to my health.  





i also had a little success with some beaded dolls, and while both types of dolls were very popular, they were still too much for my chronic pain.

earth elemental beaded doll

 earth elemental beaded doll- back



i had to give up sewing these beloved dolls and go on to other creative ventures.  i have gone back to drawing and painting which i had enjoyed in my younger years but never really felt was my groove.  until now. 

now i’m ready to fling paint.  to learn by doing.  to be free and fly and be true to myself. 



i’m at a point where i am considering really putting myself and my art out there, possibly to sell.  my art is my soul on canvas and to put a price tag on my soul is a frightening thing.  i am sensitive to a fault and any perceived criticism to my art would be a blow.  i know people who have this need to belittle others to build themselves up, and the internet has many people who do this for fun.  i do not want to put my feelings on the line for a sale or two, so am stalling taking the big step. 

i have considered going to art events to show my work and possibly make a sale, but i don’t see how anything like that will work for me right now.  i have social anxiety disorder which makes any social interaction hell on earth.   i even have to psych myself up to visit with a friend or family member, even my own grown children.  

i think i honestly need a manager.  someone who will walk me thru these difficult things, take my hand and lead me thru the danger, making sure the bad guys don’t get me!  someone who will check emails to make sure they don’t have mean things in them before i read them.  someone who will go with me to functions and do the majority of the small talk.  it might make me look stuck up or something, but i can’t do things the way others do.  some really make living life look easy!

i still have time to make up my mind to sell or not to sell.  i have a lifetime, really.  but, with my art studio under construction my life is still a mess.  i can’t do all the things i wish to do artistically with a lot of my materials still in boxes.  i have at least until my studio is complete to make a decision.  then i will have space to be more organized to be a “real” business. 


this blog is a huge step for me toward whatever i decide to do next with my art.  and believe me when i say i have lost a lot of sleep about even this step!  i will sit with things the way they are, until i am more comfortable and the terror becomes more manageable before deciding to change things up again.



until later,
jenny

Saturday, June 13, 2015

creating my style

 as an artist who is currently renewing my passion, i’m finding it difficult to find a style i enjoy.  before getting involved with the (almost) daily practice of putting paint to canvas i watched youtube videos of various artists, falling in love with the variety of styles they produced, and being amazed at how easy they made it all look.

now that i am actually getting down to the art part of things, i find myself  going thru those artists styles, trying to find my own charm while also trying to not copy their works, and yet i wonder; how does one learn without copying?

i enjoy canvas work much more than journal work, feeling like i’m wasting paint by hiding it in between the covers of a journal.  the fact that a good journal that can hold a ton of paint and other media will be more expensive than i can afford at the moment is on my mind as well, where i can find old inexpensive and well loved canvasses more cheaply at tag sales and flea markets.  i adore using the colors someone else has used as a base for my mixed media.  i find they have more life in them already, more texture, more energy.



so, the worry about creating something that looks like another artists work is there in the back of my mind every time i create.  if i decide to sell the canvas will it pose a problem if it resembles too much another artists work?  does one have a style that is totally unique?  i see so many different styles in my art groups i subscribe to, but i wonder if they found the techniques from someone else.  are they mixing and matching what they like and using them in their own way, or have they created this style on their own?  also, since I am enjoying creating portraits of some sort or another, how many portrait styles are there, really?  how do you create a face that is your own style?  do i want to be more stylized or try to be more realistic?  can’t i do both?  what if i want to do both?  there seems to be a rule that you need to find *your style* and then only do that in different ways.  sounds boring to me.  i don’t know.


just muddling through this as best i can.  and that’s all i can do.  and if i break a few rules along the way?  well, i guess someone’s just gonna have to call the art police.

until later,
jenny

Friday, June 12, 2015

an update on my works in progress

i've done some work to a couple of canvasses, and am digging both right now.

this;



became this;


and this;



became this;


i'm still working on both, as you can see, but am pretty happy with them, apart from a couple of things that i need to tweak here and there.

until later,
jenny

Thursday, June 11, 2015

what i'm working on

i have several canvasses in different stages of completion right now, so i thought i'd show them to you.


this is in it's background phase right now.  its a combination of acrylics, india inks, charcoal pencils and oil pastels.  i want the background to be full of fun colors and inspiring words.  the idea was about creating your story the way you want it to read.



this is being painted on a previous watercolor artwork of mine.  i had forgotten it was watercolor until it started to smear when i worked on top so i had to stop until i sprayed some fixative on it.  as i started painting her face, the eyebrows got away from me.  that, along with the mustache looking smudge on her upper lip, was when i knew that Frida had come out to play.  i'm excited to get back to work with her!



this is a fun one, and huge at 24" x 30"!  the background was intuitive painting, then when i found shapes and outlined them in charcoal pencil they reminded me of flowers and a butterfly, so i went with the playful feeling of it.    i'm feeling stuck with it at this point, wanting it to be perfect, and that is not how i want to feel when creating (especially this one), so it will sit until i can relax and just go with whatever comes out.


this is a shiny painting, with gold and purple acrylics in the background and gold wings.  i first collaged some decorative paper and old russian pages from a 1903 book that was falling apart at the seams.  the inspiration of this painting comes from a poem;

oh soul,
you worry too much.
you have seen your own strength.
you have seen your own beauty.
you have seen your golden wings.
of anything less,
why do you worry?
you are in truth
the soul, of the soul, of the soul.
~ Rumi


i want my art to be inspiring, joyful, spiritual and meaningful.  i'm inspired by beauty.  my art creates something inside of me that i can't explain, but mark can usually tell if i have been creating.  and not just by the mess on my hands, face, hair and clothes, either!  even if i have cleaned myself up before he gets home, he can tell by the sparkle in my eyes and my bubbly mood that i had a good day of 'arting'.

until later,
jenny