Showing posts with label mental health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mental health. Show all posts

Monday, January 2, 2023

merry new year, and all that jazz

hi there!  merry holidays and new year, 2023!  it's been many, many months since blogging here, and with reason;  i've done no art-ing in all that time.  none.  zilch.  nada. 

my year has been filled with gardening and canning the fruits of my labor.  it's been filled with love and sadness.  it's been filled with learning, with anxieties, with lyme disease pitfalls and ill health.  it's been filled with a growing depression, and also laughter with sweet hubby.  life has been full, but with a stagnation of my creativity on paper and canvas.  the studio became more and more of a holding place of things that didnt have a home and a place for when a quick decision was needed to put something.  my creative space was in a sad state, and the limited movement created by such a state meant i went to the studio, took a quick turn and left, knowing i couldnt fling paint the way it needed to be flung.

my kids came at christmas and as always asked if i'd done any new paintings.  the shame i felt inside myself knowing that i havnt used my creative juices for so long was tangible and has now been turned into action.  i asked some strong people to help lift heavy things out of the studio, and i decided that the huge, my sized, "besties holiday" painting that i blogged about in my last post must be painted over in order for me to want to hang it in my home.  it's been in the way in my studio for too long, but i just cant hang it in a prominent place when it isnt my style.  it's not my personal style, but i still have it up in my store so i can buy myself a tote or a small print if i want to.  i have a new story in my head that i sketched out the other day.  i've searched my personal archive and unsplash and have printed out about 20 reference/idea images for this project.  and so, the stage has been set that i will soon be creating a new piece.  a many layered, multi-focused painting that will take time to complete.  (that's the plan, anyway...)

sketch of my thoughts so far

 

today i have started with tidying and organizing the studio in order to be able to move around.  the next step will be to gesso over the old painting before the fun process of a layered, drippy, colorful underpainting.


say goodbye


for the new year i've got many ideas and two daily planners to keep me moving in the direction i wish to go instead of wallowing in my mud;

i've been off facebook since christmas eve, and it's been so freeing to be off such a soulsucking non-activity.  my plan is to stay off it for as long as i can/want, and then if i go back to it, to limit myself to 1 hour 3 times a week.  (i'll try to update on social media when i post here, but i hope to soon update the blog to include a subscription by email).  i also want to limit my youtube time for the same reason.  it's time for me to live my own life, not to watch others live theirs, and not to wallow in others dramas.  my time on fb and utube must be purposeful and healing, not for low vibration activities;

i've got to get my health back on track.  lyme and co-infection symptoms have been tiptoeing back and thats a scary thought.  i will be going back to my old journals and notes to see what helped me when i was under an integrative doctors supervision, and i will do more research to get myself back to a good place.  i also want and need to lose some of the weight i've been slowly gaining, so i've got a plan for that as well with habit tracking my exercise, a yoga challenge, food journaling and just trying to be as active as i can;

i've decided not to do any art classes this year, which was a big decision as i enjoy the community created within the Lets Face It group on facebook.  since i'm restricting my tech usage, since i havnt been working on classwork, since i've felt bad comparing my work with others, and since i know my own style... well, it seemed a waste of money to continue this year.  i've got a list of art goals i'd like to work on this coming year, and a backlog of classes i could work on if i decide i'm stuck and need a push;

i've got a list of foods and recipes i'd like to can, and i would like to learn how to make a good homemade bread (one of my sons is heavy into breadbaking and delighted the family with a couple loaves baked during our Family Game Day on january 1st).

all these things combined with seed starting and planting my gardens this spring and early summer should help me off the couch, leading to a more healthful and enjoyable life-worth-living for me.  


i wish for you all things wonderful in the new year!


until later,

jenny


Thursday, February 21, 2019

thinking out loud

I finished my bears yesterday.  heres where they were;




then I got inspired by this dried up bit on my palette


heres where they ended up
"Bear Guide" and "Strength from Within"

I used the yellow I mixed up with a pallet knife and dabbed it down in just a few spots, then mixed some teal and white and carefully dragged it and dabbed it around the still wet areas.  they are so full of texture, and I love them!

I also finished this weeks Lets Face It class with Ivy Newport yesterday.  we learned 'the box technique' where you put a box directly around your subject, hitting all the outermost points, and find the shapes within the box to map out your focal point.  my attempt wasn't as successful as I had hoped it would be as we dont have toner for our printer at the moment, so my proportions were off.  I couldn't map it with my ruler...

got frustrated at the head and face, 
so jotted some notes and left it

yesterday was a really good mental health day for me. mark got home and I was bubbly and talkative and smiling. not one tiny bit of anxiety or sadness. it was a feeling I'd like to repeat as often as I can!
went to bed tired last night, as I usually do. had a hard time settling down, as I usually do. one thing was different, though. instead of anxiety, it was paint color choices that I was excited about for my next minis. subject matter is decided, reference photos found, and now color! I so wanted to skip sleep and start working!
so, today I start working on my newest minis, and varnish my bears which got scanned last night for my society6 and redbubble shops. this weekend has a lot of art business stuff happening, including adding more items to both online shops, and bringing my bears to Bates Crafters Gallery. busy, busy trying to get my name out there!

until later,
Jenny